I have decided to open a health farm. I can offer a variety of treatments depending upon your requirements.
I have a basement room, that is multifunctional, it can be a refuge for people who need an escape from ironing, no sockets down there. It can also be an indoor swimming pool complete with spa mud. It has also been known to house 'other equipment'.
I can offer 'cow lick' exfoliations - not for the feint hearted, 'cow wee' sinus/nasal clearings and finally I can offer 'calf-o-suction'. You'd be amazed at just how much bum cheek will fit into a calf's mouth when you are bent over bottle feeding Tiny. I now have a left bum cheek like Kylie's and the right bum cheek still resembles Dawn French's.
For further details email me.